You wouldn’t think that my generation of women who were early to embrace personal freedom would become radio silent about our personal challenges now that it is later in our lives. But I think it has happened. Some of us did marry our childhood sweethearts. But many of us are now single having outlived our mates. Some of us have never been married but are in relationships that drag on. And some are single by choice. Yes, to be single is a choice.
Regardless of our decision, most of us contemplated leaping into this chapter of our lives with abandon. Often that did not occur. And gone is the openness that made us a little different than those before us. Rarely is there much discussion about intimacy, personal finances or the other hard stuff we are really dealing with that is real in our lives.
Some of the reason for that, I maintain, is that we have been conditioned into silence. We (always we means some of us) were taught that no one wants to hear us complain. And so we don’t.
Let’s reset that practice and tell a different story. My suggestion for a new approach to this silence is contained within this African parable.
” Each evening the father reads his son a bedtime story; night after night for many years, the father reads the same story to his son. The story always begins with the antelope challenging the lion to a fight, and ends with the antelope triumphant in the fight over the lion. Years go by, when finally the son, frustrated by the lion always losing, stops his father mid-story – “Father, when will the lion win?” And the father replies to his son, “When the lion tells his story, then the Lion will win”.
Let’s tell our own story. Let’s dream ourselves awake. Come to Martha’s Vineyard and let’s focus on this one seminal and revolutionary task.
Register here. If you have questions, please reach out.
Deborah Davis says
There is great power in the meaning behind these words for me: “Let’s tell our own story. Let’s dream ourselves awake.” There are few greater experiences than that of women coming together, opening, sharing, supporting, stimulating and lifting up each other.
Patricia A Patton says
yes the parable spoke to me. And when I feel “Oh no one cares” I just remind myself of it. Thanks for reading.
Sandra Lewis says
This resonates so deeply with me. You know that I believe in fully living our #truth. If we don’t fulfill our purpose, no one will. Thank you for opening a door, plowing a path for women to share our stories.
Patricia A Patton says
Ah thank you Sandra.It is a small thing to lift others up. I don’t even need anyone’s permission. (smile)
Elle Gibson says
Patricia,
You struck a chord of undeniable truth. When we don’t tell our story we denying a great part of our strength to live as our authentic self.
I hope figure out a way to take the journey.
Elle
Patricia A Patton says
Elle I so agree with you. We all want to be more of who we are.
Teresa Speight says
Wow…if I could change my Paris Adventure, I would most certainly be there. I agree, we must, MUST tell our stories.
Patricia A Patton says
The beauty is that we each tell our stories in different ways. But the important thing is that we do it. Oprah might not call us. (smile)