I am not a minimalist. But for several years I’ve been looking for answers to the question of what do you do if you want to change your life. I’ve been stuck without a plan given my responsibilities and all the stuff I’ve accumulated over the years. By boomer time, there is generally a mortgage. If not a mortgage, there are other things you love that you see as a reflection of yourself and they need somewhere to be. Then there are the sentimental items you think you love that document your life’s adventures. And there are also promises, whether defined by credit you owe or personal responsibility that prevent you from proceeding through your life free and easy.
Still I’ve been wanting to move on and I decided to work through the emotional block that was preventing this from happening. Without going into all of what that block encompasses, let me say I was able to come to terms with what might be possible in a new life but only after I decided to downsize. Then the fog evaporated and a plan began to evolve.
To meet my goal of more freedom, I needed to reduce my expenses. Here is what I did:
Set a Date to Get Started
Seems obvious but if you don’t start it will never happen. In my case I hired a realtor and quickly learned it might be possible to rent my home for an amount that made renting worthwhile. So my suggestion is do what is necessary to get started. Don’t try to do something that is not your strength or you may wind up like the hairdresser whose hair is always a mess or the accountant who never does his own taxes. Put the start aspect of your move in someone else’s hands while you begin working on step two of your plan.
Figure out your must haves
Continuing with my example of downsizing, no matter where I have lived, whether a 3 bedroom poorly laid out coop in Harlem, a 4BR pied-de-terre with 12 foot ceilings in north Newark, New Jersey or my beach cottage along the Jersey Shore, I have always surrounded myself with art, plants, books, and good light. But in coming to the decision to downsize, I also realized I do not need everything in my immediate environment. It seems obvious but it is a painful process to detach from my favorite things and to feel good about it.
Act
Nothing happens without action. And act you must even if you fail. Sometimes the best experiences comes from failures. Either way, there is no losing if you act because no matter the outcome, the process of acting becomes a great teaching moment.
I don’t know what you need to do but these 3 quick steps have gotten me to a point where I feel comfortable enough to move into uncharted waters. What are your best suggestions for moving forward to change your life?
Rachee says
Great tips for anything in life! I love setting a date to get started; too often I will talk about something but never get it in motion. I also appreciate that you asked for the help you needed. Far too often we (I) think we (I) can do it all alone and it’s not a bad thing to ask for help.
Patricia A Patton says
That start date Rachee makes you jump rather than wait for a perfect moment. And surely learning I would say at a late time in life to ask for help has been the big new piece of learning for me. Thanks for your comment and visit.
Joyce@MommyTalkShow says
Sometimes I get overwhelmed by all the things I’d like to change. So I try to focus on one per week or one per day. I strive for change, not perfection.
Patricia A Patton says
I really think the one per week strategy is one to try. Thanks for throwing that into the hat. I will try it.
Brandi says
This is a fantastic post. I especially like the thought that we should get help from someone who can take care of some of the tasks that we need to take care of in order to move forward. I’d also add, NOW is the time. Just start. Make a move. What I started doing, even before I knew when or where I was moving to, was packing and eliminating items in my home that I wouldn’t want to take on a move. Another time, when I was just moving out of my parents home into my first apartment during college, I spent months stockpiling home items like a toaster oven, shower curtain, dishes, etc. By the time I was ready to move, I had 3/4 of the stuff ready. Just start.
Patricia A Patton says
Thank you Mrs. Riley. I have to get used to this (smile) START. Just start NOW is almost as good as Just Do it! Most of us don’t have the motivation to just start. But that is the key. Thank you Brandi